I try to pretend that I am a loner, like it somehow makes me stronger, but really, being a loner sucks. I tell myself and others that I am “independent,” and that I don’t “need” friends around me all the time. I couldn’t be more wrong. Humans need other humans in their human lives. That’s just science. Who wants to eat a banana by themselves? No heterosexual.
Look at Alan. As soon as he got Doug, Phil, and Stu, he knew he had a wolf pack. Lemme quote Alan:
I consider myself a bit of a loner. I tend to think of myself as a one-man wolf pack. But when my sister brought Doug home, I knew he was one of my own. And my wolf pack- it grew by one, so where there two- there were two of us in the wolf pack. I was alone first in the wolf pack and Doug joined in later. And six months ago, when Doug introduced me to you guys, I thought ‘Wait a second, could it be?’ And now I know for sure- I just added two more guys to my wolf pack. The four of us wolves, running around the desert together in Las Vegas, looking for strippers and cocaine. So tonight, I make a toast! Takes out a knife and cuts his hand. Blood Brothers!
I just hope I do not become like Alan, but I fear for myself when I am alone. Cause I do strange things.
I shave my legs. Seriously. Depressing. The back of the knee is so hard to get too. Again, depressing.
I make up my own rap songs. I have NEVER been good at it.
I wander the house looking…. There is absolutely no loose change in our house or leper-cons.
I facebook stalk. How sad.
I just look at my wall. No doubt man, like my own prison, straight thug.
I write in my journal. More prison stuff, you wouldn’t get it.
I go to movies. Not too bad actually.
I play on a seesaw.
Work on my craft.