I made a reminder in my phone about this day several weeks ago. Selling alarms. In just four hours of knocking doors I had this thought, “there has to be an easier way.” I waited for some kind of intuition, but nothing came. No moment of zen, enlightenment, or epiphany. I realized that I have no set of skills or ingenuity, as of now, that would provide any substantial monetary compensation. That was a sad moment. But this for a season and for a reason.
I am sacrificing now for the late. Money is the tool of liberation and freedom (or of captivity). These are my reasonings. As contrived as they may be, I have to believe in this decree. I have to buy into a world where your intrinsic worth and manhood is determined by the amount of accounts you sell. Its a crass and racial world. A world that I would rather not be apart of. There are some bright spots. I am in a beautiful place. I get to work on my communication skills. I will get a sweet farmers tan. Hopefully some beach time will cure that. I don’t have to study for anything. Life is relatively simpler. Sure, there are some positives. But obviously not that many, mostly because I am blogging.