I just spent the past six days watching baseball and traveling the roads from Lafayette, Baton Rouge and New Orleans. Its been a great time and an enjoyable vacation – and you cared to know this. I have spent some time in the South before and I love the beauty of the land, it hearty meals, and the hospitality and passion of its people.
|They take baseball serious, even religious|
I thought it prudent to share some of the baseball sayings I heard while I watched the Rajin’ Cajuns baseball team. So, like a true southerner, tuck in that polo shirt into whatever pants or shorts you are wearing, get your sunglasses with chums around your neck, and wear more of your teams gear than the university book store has. It’s time for ball.
Get after the Ump
This is critical to the game. To be a fan it’s very important to be able to blame the officials for bad calls and ultimately the result of the game. Note that you don’t have to lead out on the attack on another human being, but it is encouraged to join in with the crowd on hurling insults and loud noises at the officials. This is what courage looks like.
A little terminology goes a long way. So you need to know that the head official in baseball is the guy behind the catcher and is referred to as “Blue”. Naturally, a great way to show that you are a legitimate baseball fan and gain some credibility is to say: C’mon Blue! Very easy. You can go back to this well over and over. Drink from it deeply and often. If you wanna make it more complicated you could say: Wake up, Blue! Its 2 O’clock (or whatever time it currently is). OR you could be like: Hey Blue, what game are you watching? Change the channel! OR Check your phone Blue, you missed a call! This is a good foundation to build off of and you should take confidence as you hear others in agreement with you. As you gain experience you should think of other creative lines.
Inspiring your Players
You have an obligation to be there for your team. This is how you can go from an armchair coach to being IN the game. Plus players can totally hear and care about what you are saying….
A great simple line is to state the initials of the player at bat or pitching OR stating the players numbers. For example if I’m up to bat and my number is 10, you could say, Let’s go D-H. OR Let’s go one-zero. You would never say the full name like, “David” or the number “ten”. It’s always two letters and numbers; “Barry Bonds” = B.B. “ten” = one-zero. Some other low hanging fruit is: Battle, son. Battle! OR Make him work! Even, Go to WORK! works. You can fill time with saying these tidbits twice. Its really cool when you do that. Make him work! Make him work, son.
Oh, in case there was any confusion, the players are close as kin, even closer, they are your children. Your sons. I highly encourage you to call them son.
Part of this relationship is the importance to help discipline and scold your team for making mistakes, because the coach won’t hold them accountable and the players probably don’t feel remores about their mistake. So a good thing to do is to state the obvious, You gotta be ready 1-7. This is most helpful after they make an error. 1-7 was probably just thinking about what he is going to do after the game or if he has recorded the season finale of The Walking Dead.
Also, when its a crucial part of the game a great one is: Be a leader! Be a leader, son. This truly reminds them of the weight of the situation and their responsibility to the University, to you, each other and ultimately to life. Be a WINNER. Be A WINNER! I should note here that this resulted in mixed outcomes.
|We clapped this game to a Victory for the Cajuns.|
Getting into the Opponents Head
Another central role in a fandom is talking trash to the opponent. The best way to do this is to make fun of them. Be as debased as you possibly can be. Their hair, teeth, their name, the way they walk, all of it is fair game — how tragic are we?
The pitcher is the easiest target. He’s out on an island – literally on a raise island of dirt in a pond of green – and obviously plays an immense role in the game. If you can shake him, there are sure to runs to be had. Let’s say that he is behind in the counts, especially if he is on ball two or three, start to just bellow Ball fourrrrrr. Ballll fourrrrrrr. He’s all out of sorts now. WALLLKKKKK. And then, when he walks your guy, you know it was because of you and you alone that the pitcher succumbed to his human nature and failed. Remind him of his failure in the next inning as well.
Now that you have a guy on base you can really razz him. Your guy on first will have a bit of gap between himself and first base, in order to get a better start running when the ball is hit. The pitcher will try to keep him honest and throw to the first baseman; this prevents your hitter from getting to far away and trying stealing second. If you are confused by this explanation then watch a game. ANYWAY, anytime the pitcher throws to first, and I mean any time, call for a BALKKKK. Nothing can be more aggravating that you screaming for a BALK. Always call for the balk.
If the roles were reversed and the opponent is up to bat and they have a guy on base you start saying: TURN TWO. TURRRNNN TWOOOOOO. That’ll get those bad guys!
Finally, the silver bullet is clapping. Clapping in unison, clapping loud, starting a group clap, clapping to clap, clap, clap, CLAP, CLAPPPPPPPP. This kills it! Clap to songs, clap after a play, clap on your boys. OBVIOUSLY, you are also whooping and hollering when you’re clapping. But the clap doesn’t lose its voice. It doesn’t get thirsty. It doesn’t have to think of the next creative line. The opponents fall apart when you applaud their mistake and your teams good plays. Telling you, clap your hands goes a long way to getting a W.